Suggestions for first draft of card text rewrites

[cg]

Please put them here. Current draft text is up on the test server. http://40.117.144.196:13602/

Note that we know there are a lot of cards that overflow the text box, please don't worry about reporting it (though if anyone happened to compile a full list of them it would save me time). We will address that one way or another before these go live.


edit: ongoing list of things that need fixed that i can't fix directly in skilltext.js:
(from first draft, might be done already)

• thermal recoil (absorber) shield text needs changed to “Increases damage from each attacker by 1.”
• Losecharge should change its text to “Expires at the end of this turn.” at turns:0
• Upped pillar: remove negative cost, gain “Gain 1 whatever when this card comes into play.”
• Precog should affect all opponents for the purposes of 2v2 or 1v1v1
• upped pillar change also to whatever else costs -1

(from second draft)

• "2frozen" -> "Frozen (2)". Also lives and anything else that shows charges.
• show different text for card in hand/editor vs in play. update losecharge text while in hand/editor to "Lasts for X turns". X should count the turn it's played (i forget what you index the charges to), so dim shield should say 2/3.
• can we easily make 1/4 (eg quad towers, tesseract) display as "1/4" (three charcters) instead of converting into the actual one-character 1/4 fraction? it's really hard to distinguish the fraction with the low text size
• give psion the card text "Psionic cards deal spell damage and typically bypass shields.". if we want to give psion an "ability" that does nothing called "psioncardtext" or something in order to make it have this text, that's fine with me. also if there are any other creatures that start with a complicated passive (hognose?) that isn't explained by their active, we should do something similar with dummy abilities to give them card text
• make the things that use the unicode fraction symbol for 1/4 or whatever to instead say "1/4" with three characters so it's easier to read
• resolve overflow either by the expandy text box animation or by whatever anti says.

[li]make unupped repulsor say "enters play with 1 stack". if this is a huge pain in the ass, we should find another way to make it clear that unupped repulsor is 1dr.
[/li][/list]

Spoiler for for me to do for draft2:

fiiiiine, go through and replace "put x into play" with "summon x"
move sanc/diss interaction explanation to diss
fix fire bolt
tunneling your
soi -ed
shtriga -s
sosac quanta
command skel equal to their str
beguile gain control
fenghuang target creature gains
wyrm this creature
scattering wind doesn't trigger on-draw effects (except for the draw a card card)
tornado +s
chrys give opp 1 pois countr
steam -the
siren sing->this
ice bolt fix like fire bolt
scorp like chrys
tidal healing frozen
alch list cards maybe
pink jelly 4
(make my own list of overflowing cards)
(double-check overflowing card text in the code)

[Chapuz]

 
Space Whale: replace 2fronzen with Frozen (2)
Phase spider: Target creature loses its Airborne status
Phase shield: Block all attacks for 2 turns
Dream catcher: Remove 'Does not affect Dissipation Field'. Pointless specification nitpick and the text would enter in the card.
Parallel Universe: Put --> Summon (on general terms I like better summon for creatures and put for permanents)

 
FFQ: Summon a Firefly. It wounds better (and keeps consistency with Graviton Deployer)
Owl: The 'ultil the end of their turn' makes no sense, as you always see the foe's hand when it's on play. I would just leave 'Reveal opponent's hand'
Wyrm: through next attack --> until next attack (maybe?)
Pixie: Shuffle target creature into its owner's deck. That player summons a random creature from their deck.
SoFr: Text overflowing the card space

 
Black Nymph: (for consistency with Vampire): Target creature is poisoned and it's skill is replaced with "Heal yourself equal to the damage dealt by this card."
Black Cat: 9lives --> 9 lives
Devourer: The new description misses the fact that it converts the absorbed quanta to  ... or it's just outside the text box?

 
Pharaoh: Summon a Scarab
Golden Nymph: Draw --> Draw a card.

[7636bas]

Owl: The 'ultil the end of their turn' makes no sense, as you always see the foe's hand when it's on play. I would just leave 'Reveal opponent's hand'

Prolly of relevance when the Owl gets chased out of the field and we need to know exactly when you can no longer see your opp's hand?
Meanwhile, I decided to compile a list of cards that have text length issues. Unless explicitly mentioned otherwise, a card is in the same problem bracket for its unupgraded and upgraded variant.

Spoiler for List of cards with overflowing text:

Definition: Card text is more than 8 rows long when sans-serif font is set to Calibri. (It's what I'm running, so deal with 'why Calibri in particular'.)

• Disc/Chakram
• Reaper
• Graviton Defender
• Orochi
• Golem Defender
• Druid [Elf is not even hard to read]
• Arctic Dolphin
• Shard of Patience
• (Minor) Null Mantis
• Thunderbird
• Shard of Freedom
• Scarab
• Dune Scorpion
• Devourer/Pest
• Dream Catcher

Spoiler for List of cards with 'hard to read' card text:

Definition: Card text runs into the rarity symbol, but does NOT overflow, when sans-serif font is set to Calibri. (It's what I'm running, so deal with 'why Calibri in particular'.)

• Fallen Elf/Fallen Druid
• Tomb
• Shtriga
• Ouija Essence
• Catapult
• Tidal Healing
• Ferro Golem
• Flooding [only barely past the rarity mark]
• Byakko
• Fenghuang
• Pixie
• Neurotoxin
• Voodoo Doll
• Black Nymph/Dark Nymph
• Psyche Metal
• Tesseract
• Shard of Wisdom

Spoiler for Miscellaneous suggestions:

• Quantum Locket: Add this if it fits: 'This card can target immaterial or burrowed cards.'
  (I asked in the discochat if this thing is supposed to be able to nail immaterial, Fippe said yes. Fippe also said 'it should say that it can target immaterals, like SoW does'.)
• Ouija Source and unupgraded Waterfall: I thought the upkeep is incurred when the player finishes their Main Phase 1 (I'm borrowing YGO terminology there), not when the creature makes its attack?
• Shard of Integrity: 'Destroy all shards ...', not 'Destroyed all shards ...' :P
• Druid: Is ' : Cast Shockwave on target creature or player' a valid substitute?
• Lifesmith and Flying Weapon: FW effects can now target enemy weapon, thus 'even though it isn't in your weapon slot' doesn't make much sense when what you have Flown was your opp's weapon instead.
• Heat Mirror: Missing space ('... put a Sparkinto play.')
• Immolation: It creates one of everything, and then 5 Fire (thus 6 Fire, not the 5 it might imply). Ditto w/ Cremation (a net of 8 Fire).
• Writ of Vengeance: I'd rather have '... during opponent's turn, SAID creature attack and this card loses 1 charge.'

[serprex]

upkeep is talking about creatures while it usually appears on perms (waterfall/flooding)

cgedit: addressed comments through here.